Similarly, when we think of something in the past or something in the future, we tend to focus on certain aspects of the experience. And to us what we choose to focus on becomes most real in our minds.
Some people have a pattern of focusing on pictures, sounds and feelings that put them into un-resourceful states while others generate pictures, sounds and feelings them put them into resourceful states.
How about you? What do you do when you meet with failure? Some people keep playing mind pictures of themselves screwing up. Some people even play it like a bad movie, over and over again in their heads.
They keep seeing themselves making the bad decisions, experiencing the consequences and they re-play all the negative voices around them. They may play the sound of their boss shouting at them. Then they run an internal dialogue that goes like this: 'How could I have been so stupid!' 'Why do I always screw things up?'
What kind of pictures and sounds should one play to produce a resourceful state?
Well, this is what positive people do when they encounter failure.They choose to re-present the failure as feedback that will lead them into finding a solution. Instead of re-playing scenes of the event or project that flopped, they focus on what they can learn from it, and how they will do it the next time...to get good results.
They may even imagine themselves succeeding, using what they havelearnt from the past experience, and their success would beaccompanied by the sounds of people cheering or the boss congratulating them.
They may play an internal dialogue that goes something like this: 'I'll make it the next time for sure', 'I'll prove that I can turn things around'. Or they'll say reflectively:' Now, what can I learn from this experience'.
Our minds are never still or idle...throughout our waking hours we play mental programs continuously. Now, start becoming aware of the kind of mental program you usually run, when you are about to take on a challenging task?
For example, just before making an important presentation or writing a difficult report, what goes on in your mind?
Are you one of those who habitually focus on how difficult it is going to be? Do you see yourself being overwhelmed and stressed out? Do you mutter under your breath, 'Oh no! How am I ever going
to do this?' 'What if I screw up?' 'It's just too difficult!' You may even picture yourself screwing up or giving up. As a result you get into a state of nervous anxiety.
But can you choose to represent the challenge very differently in your mind? Of course! You could choose to focus on how easy, fun and rewarding the challenge will be. Confident people will picture themselves dealing with the task or project effortlessly. They may even have an internal voice saying, 'I am finally getting this
done! This is so rewarding!' 'I knew I could do it.'
Now, given the same challenge, why do some people rise to it while others feel apprehension? The interesting fact is that most of us do not consciously decide what pictures, sounds and feelings we are
going to generate in our mind.
Our mind seems to be on auto-pilot and, within seconds of being faced with a challenge, it will subconsciously, create re-presentations. And the kinds of re-presentations created are dependent on past conditioning.
Isn't this scary? It appears that we do not have much control over our mind! This is why most people feel that their emotions control them.
Begin by paying full attention to the 'program' that is running in your brain-mind. If you find that what you are thinking of is not putting you in a resourceful state, then change it! In short,consciously change WHAT you focus on! You may keep slipping back,and each time you do, pull yourself up and re-focus.
If you want to have mastery over your mind and emotions, then you must begin right away to control what you focus on!
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